Rosh Hashanah 2008

Shalom

What a difference a year makes. This time last year my family and i were preparing for Rosh Hashanah. We prepared our bibles, our friends, our family, our bodies and our minds. We planned out this time until Yom Kippur and had a great expectation of what G-D would do in our family. I believe that the L-rd heard our prayers and came through. We received blessings and many other things. Some of those things were very unexpected. It seems that one of those things that was wished for came through.  I didn’t wish for or expect it but it came to pass.

Then I heard the voice of the Lord saying, “Whom shall I send? And who will go for us?”
And I said, “Here am I. Send me!
- Isaiah 6:8

Discipleship costs you everything.

I used this scripture above as my signature in my emails. At first i thought it was a nifty scripture. I read Isaiah and had a general understanding as to what it meant and i was ok with that. I was a servant called to do many things. I felt i had a calling but was unsure as to what that calling was. It wasn’t until i started being offered elderships and other pastoral positions. I had run from time and time again did I not realize the full implications of this verse.  The L-rd had delivered me from many things and blessed me in so many ways and i was now running after I had told him to send me.  I added the tagline “Discipleship costs you everything. ” after realizing too late what i should have known all along.

I’m going into Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur this year asking for forgiveness from the L-rd himself.  I did everything I knew to do. I studied and was amazed at the move of G-d that was unfolding right in front of me.  My family followed the very teachings to the letter with great faith and anticipation. Blessing after blessing appeared and many things started happening it seemed that we were in G-d’s hands after many years of wandering aimlessly.

That that then.. this is now. I no longer have a family I have my son on weekends. The divorce happened when she left. I never received any type of reason just allot of different things that she has told many people. Like a man of G-d told me.. “the divorce happened when she left, all that is left is to do the paperwork”

I struggle with all of this still and this year will be much different than last. I pray that next year is different from this one in a much better way. For 2008 being a year of new beginnings it sure has been for me. I want to thank all of your for your kind emails and prayers. I will commit to keep blogging the experiences as a “messianic gentile” I don’t have a better term for what I am. I have received emails suggesting a name change but i started out with this one and we’ll see where Yeshua takes me with it.

Shalom

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